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Spicy food varies in spiciness so to attempt to describe it I'm developing a scale, from 1 to 10, called the FoJ scale (or Flag of Japan). This is due to spicy food's knack of tasting great on the way in but causing havoc on its way out the following day. In other words it causes one's arse to do a convincing impression of the Japanese flag...
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There's a lot in the news about global warming and climate change these days. I've traced back the cause of it all and found someone to blame. Emily Pankhurst.
So the government ministers are wanting climate change to influence the budget. The treasury are being asked to combat global warming. Er, how exactly will a bunch of accountants persuade Mother Nature from taking her natural course? When are they going to get it into their thick heads that global warming is a natural process? The globe has been warming up since the last ice age.
I've been tinkering about with Linux distributions for some years now. I'd always get the system "just about working" and lacking the knowledge and inclination to tweak it until it was right, I'd eventually give up. Windows was always more convenient for me, I'd become lazy relying on GUIs to do all my configuring. Or was that just my excuse for not being technically competent enough? More than likely a bit of both. There were times where I'd sat down and started reading various HOWTOs, trying to get some service or other doing just what I wanted it to, but then there'd be dependency errors or even worse, no errors at all (at least visible ones) - the thing just refused to work. Nothing I'd read up to that point had referred me to the existence of error logs, let alone their locations.
Things have been quiet over here - maybe a little too quiet. Or perhaps they've been too hectic to post anything. Possibly. There are a couple of rants simmering at the back, awaiting seasoning and a quick stir before being unceremoniously dumped onto here somewhere. But yeah, a number of changes have taken place since the last offering of drivel...
I don't think I can remember seeing such a biased display from a referee as I did tonight when watching Chelsea versus Newcastle in the FA Cup Quarter Final. I saw several occasions where Chelsea players went through the back of Newcastle players only for the referee to wave play on, yet it seemed every 50/50 ball the foul was awarded to Chelsea. Then there's the pushing and shoving in the box during one of the free kicks - Chelsea players pushing Newcastle left right and centre yet the referee gave nothing, didn't even have a word. A few minutes later, a slight shove on John Terry and the Newcastle players are spoken to. Then to round it all off Robbie Elliot was dismissed because Shawn Wright-Phillips ran into him! Absolute disgrace.
So Mr Bennett, who made the oh so long journey from Kent to London, I hope you can sleep well in your bed after that performance. You shouldn't be allowed to officiate a jumble sale never mind another football game.
If this is a taste of the way things are going to be, with the fashionable clubs being afforded all the decisions, then I'm afraid football has died. I just so wish that fans up and down the country turn their backs on this game until the FA get off their committee-man gobshite arses and do something about it. It's nothing short of a farce.
And as for the BBC's commentary - Mark Lawrenson is a complete arse with his totally unfunny and frankly tedious comments.
Bollocks to the lot of them!
Pr0n is all around us these days. It is estimated that in Britain someone is looking at pr0n within 10 metres of where you are. On the continent in places such as Amsterdam and Hamburg, that distance is even less, perhaps as little as 10 centimetres. That's because European pr0ns are far more advanced than those in Britain. But where did pr0n come from? This article will help answer that question as we take a look at the history of pr0n.
I was hoping to keep football, and Newcastle United in particular, from these pages but recently this has become an increasingly frequent source of my misery. So I'm going to have a big rant about it to make me feel better. Yeah, that should work.
Well that was another year zooming past. It didn't seem like 2 minutes since the year began. Actually, 2005 lasted 2 hours longer than normal as it started for me in Bucharest, Romania's capital, which is 2 hours ahead of the UK. That was an experience! There were fireworks going off all over the city.
You know that Walt Disney bloke? Yeah, him that done all them cartoons and that? Donald Duck, Mickey Mouse. Aye, well they found his body the other day all thawed out. It's true, this mate of mine whose brother works for Blockbuster told me. He should know, Blockbuster you see, they've got deals with Disney to get the films off them.
On 5th December 2005 a law was introduced in Britain to allow same sex couples to enter into a civil partnership akin to marriage. You couldn't make it up could you? It's political correctness gone mad. If the government had its way then we'd all be gay. Well I can tell you for one, I won't be forced into marrying another man. And they can throw me in prison for it.
What exactly is the left hand lane on a motorway for? Lorries? Slow people? Only to be used 500m (or less) from desired exit junction? Or is there something designed into cars, particularly BMWs and Mercedes, that causes them to self-destruct if they spend too long in these lanes?
Right, freshly made bread has a shelf life of around 3 days if kept correctly. Therefore branded, packaged, ready sliced, preserved loaves must have a shelf life of at least 7 days. So why is it whenever you buy one it only has about 3 days left of its shelf life? What is it doing for those 4 days?
I've got this revolutionary idea for motorists. Instead of driving really close to the vehicle in front and then applying the brakes so that the person behind thinks you're really going to stop or something, why not release the flow of fuel into the engine by reducing the amount of pressure on the accelerator pedal and try to match the speed of the traffic?
For the past few weeks there has been much coverage in the British press regarding the new licensing laws regarding the sale and consumption of alcohol that came into force at midnight on Thursday 24th November. Anti-alcoholic and, presumably anti-having-a-laugh miserable gits, have been rather vocal in their warnings to the UK government about the changes, predicting widespread booze-induced violence and a massive increase in public order offences. I, probably along with many other people, have been very interested to see how the first weekend would go...
Now I know I should really check more than one source but BBC News is usually quite good at reporting what is going on inside these shores - and beyond. So expecting a mass of reports about various cities in England and Wales being razed to the ground by drunken hooligans along with an obligatory tale of some old biddy's cat being murdered/kebabbed/buggered by "callous thugs high on drugs and alcohol", I opened the BBC site and made my way to the news.
"GASP!" I... erm, gasped I suppose, as I discovered that not only are all the cities and towns still standing erect and proud, but the weekend passed with little or no incidents at all!
Of course, that didn't stop those who opposed the law in the first place. Oh no - apparently the weather was to blame. "Nobody wants to fight in an icy puddle" said one "but mark my words, once the weather warms up we'll be doomed! Doomed, I say, DOOMED!" he shrieked, then tottered off looking embarrassed as lightning and orchestral string music failed to emphasise the drama...
Right, so this is a blog is it? Well this isn't just any old blog - this is eggblog. What's so different about this and just shoving my meaningless ramblings on my homepage? Well apparently this blog engine will keep everything in archives or something. Great - if I go off on one offending people then it keeps the evidence. Very useful, I don't think!!
OK, so it has other uses as well, such as alowing me to post stuff under different categories without having to mess about with editing several files and then uploading them all into the correct places afterwards, not forgetting to put the relevant links in the right places. It doesn't matter how careful you are, you always miss something and end up having to upload several corrections.
I've seen that many people use their blogs as some kind of diary or journal along the lines of "I saw a rabbit the other day and it looked at me and at that moment..." or other rubbish. Well I don't think I'll bother with that especially seeing how all I do between waking up and going to bed is rant about the traffic on my way to work, spend the whole day baffled, rant about the traffic back home again, then sit around watching TV or browsing the net and reading about how people saw a rabbit that morning.
Hmmm, it seems that I can truncate my drivel so that you have to follow a link to see the rest of it. Why would I want to do that? You somehow got here so I'm going to expose you to my crap whether you like it or not. Unless you've already left the page by now, in which case I can insult you and you won't even know. HA!